Site Meter

Saturday, September 29, 2007

Why Don't I speak Irish?

So I met an American guy who asked me where I was from.When I told him Ireland he asked if I spoke Irish. I said no. He said

You're from Ireland and you don't speak Irish?

I said

Your from America, do you speak American?

He said yes. I said

No you don't you speak English

I have never in my life been asked why I don't speak Irish. I thought he was one of the most ignorant people I'd ever met. When I asked him what he knew about Ireland he said he knew shamrocks and leprechauns. So I shot him with my water pistol several times on his balding head.

Monday, September 24, 2007

The Curs-ED lighter

Ok here's the tale of the curs-ED lighter although I have a feeling that you kind of had to be there.

A couple of weeks ago in Bangkok Manjula was showing off a lighter she'd been given by some random girl in a club. It was covered in Japanese fabric or something and she seemed to think it was pretty special. Sat at Toby's on her birthday night she all of a sudden decided that she didn't want this lighter anymore so she gave it to me. I tried to refuse knowing that this was a prized possession but she insisted. Half an hour later she asked me if I still had the lighter. Thinking she wanted it back I said yes and tried to give it to her but she didn't want it back. She just wanted to make sure that I still had it. So I said,

What's up Manjula is this lighter curs-ED or something because you really don't want it?

She denied all knowledge of it being curs-ED and made up some lame excuse about how she didn't want it anymore but she wanted someone to have it. It was all sounding dubious to me.

We all forgot about the lighter until we went back to mine to get even more inebriated than we already were (it was Manju's birthday after all). Manjula was the first to leave after getting suitably wasted. Five minutes later there was a knock at the door. Brad almost had a heart attack thinking it was security or the police or the devil or someone and when I opened the door there stood Manju claiming that she needed a light for her cigarette. I demanded that she take her lighter back but she was having none of it. This only served to make me even more convinced that the lighter was indeed curs-ED.

Brad kindly donated his lighter to Manju and she left. We all sat on the bed with the curs-ED lighter sat ominously in the middle of us. Romy had an idea. We should make a film about the lighter. Brad and I got to work on the plotline. So Manju has an evil lighter. She doesn't want it anymore so she gives it to one of her friends who then dies mysteriously in a tragic accident. The lighter somehow finds it's way back to Manjula. She gives it to another friend who also dies. And so on and so on until the police arrest Manju on suspicion of murder. She denies it all blaming it on the curs-ED lighter. Naturally the police think she's ting tong (crazy).

At this point Romy pipes up:

What kind of movie is this?

Brad and I tell her that this is a standard movie plot line. She wants to know why can't the movie just be the lighter going on a killing rampage.

What kind of movie would that be Romy?

I have visions of the curs-ED lighter sprouting arms and brandishing a machete.

And still the lighter sits there on the bed looking at us. Daring us to use it.

I don't want the lighter anymore. I try to give it to Romy. She can't even touch it. Natalie can't even look at it. Brad hates it. I decide to get rid of it and chuck it in the laundry basket. 20 minutes later Brad realises he has no lighter because he gave his to Manju. He fishes the curs-ED one out of the laundry basket. Everyone goes home. Nobody dies. But no one feels the same about Manju's "special" lighter.

Sunday, September 23, 2007

Brain Overload

I actually have loads to write about but I don't know where to start. I want to write about school and the book I'm reading and tales of curs-ED lighters but there's not enough time in the day.

Update on my dietry habits: I'm proud of myself for eating yellow curry the other night. I'm getting better at the spicy food.

Exams in Thailand are funny. When the kids finish they all talk to each other even if other students are still doing it. Thai people are obsessed with talking. They don't know how to be quiet. Maybe it's because if they are silent they will fall asleep in the heat.

Anyway, I'm pushed for time so have to tell my tales another day.

Monday, September 17, 2007

Decisions Decisions

I just don't know what to do on my holidays. I have 10 days to 2 weeks (no one ever really knows the score). Obviously I will be travelling. But where to, I don't know. North, South or both? I just don't know. I'm not trying to cram as much as possible into one trip because I know I have the whole of April to travel. Danny boy is coming when I have this holiday so obviously it depends on what he'd like to do as well. I'm thinking of just jumping on the first train I see and getting off when I'm bored of the train.

But obviously I'm gonna need some beach action at some point.

Did you here the news about the plane crash in Phuket? Toby told us nearly everyone died (he also told us this while kind of giggling but that is the Thai way). Our head of English said that it was mostly foreigners on the plane. Toby also said that something had been tampered with on the plane (or at least we think he was saying this as his English isn't too great). They're on tsunami watch as well. Perhaps the North would be a better option for a holiday.

The weekend was a funny one. Anne-Marie left on Friday and Keara and Jo left on Saturday. Everyone headed up to Bangkok for a last party but I stayed in Lopburi. I hate Bangkok. There are good things there like the jazz bar and good restaurants but you have to put up with the hassle as well. It's too expensive and I'd rather keep my money for my hols.

For the first time since being here I woke up to the rain on Saturday morning. It reminded me of home. Except at home you think there's no point getting up because it will more than likely rain all day. Here you know it will stop after an hour and everything dries quickly. It was sad saying goodbye to Keara. We've had a lot of fun over the past 3 months. We had a joke about this old guy who pushes market stalls back and forth being her No. 1. He's real sexy with his shirt off and his dislocated bottom jaw with his tongue hanging sexily out of the side of his mouth. Me and Brad have been fighting over who should get him when Keara left. I think he won the fight.

But people come and then they leave and then new people come and then they leave and that's just the way life is. I was lucky to have spent the time with those dudes and when we're all back in Ireland we'll meet. Anyway, if anyone has any recommendations of what I should do on my hols let me know.

Monday, September 10, 2007

Goodybye Girls

I've only been here for 3 months but you get used to the way things are. This is Keara and Anne-Marie's last week in Lopburi. They will be missed by me Brad and Romy.

The first night I got chatting to Keara I couldn't believe I had finally met someone else who wanted to be a carpenter and who loves using an old fashioned SLR rather than a digital. She partied with Alabama 3 for one of her birthdays and she loves all the same Bright Eyes songs as me. When I bonded with her I said "Keara's my new best man friend in Lopburi" and Brad accused her of stealing me away from him.

Anne Marie is a cutie. She attracts all the boys with her blonde hair and then acts all coy about it. She's been missing her boyfriend for months now but she's finally been reunited with him. We were helping her count down the days because we've been so excited for her.

I'm gonna miss the Irish girls but when they leave more teachers will come and a change is as good as a rest. Also, they're from Ireland and we'll always be touching base at some point so it's not the last time I'll ever see them.

Today I went to a Doctor's house because I will be tutoring his two children every Tuesday for 2 hours. I didn't particularly want any extra teaching but he's offering good pay and it's more of a favour for one of the teachers at school. He is seriously rich though. I have been to posh houses inIreland and England but nothing like this house. He has 5 different sports cars in his garage. It's a little bit intimidating but he says he doesn't expect it to be serious. He doesn't want me to do reading and writing and grammar with them just speaking and listening.

A teacher's work is never done. Sometimes I feel like people are insane about learning English.

Tuesday, September 04, 2007

End of Term

Haven't had much time to post as I've been busy doing Bangkok with Romy et al for her real birthday celebrations. We went for mexican food and Brad and I had been dreaming and fantasising about it for a week. I got the enchiladas as advised by pretty much everyone. Then it was off to the Saxophone jazz bar where we went for Anne Marie's birthday. The band were just as good as they were the last time. The bass player told Keara that the band had been talking with each other about how every time they looked at me I was always dancing and smiling. Well if a band will play good music I will smile and dance.

After the first band finished I started to flag. Nothing to do with the fact that I had been drinking at Toby's 'til 6 O'Clock that morning. It was because it was our last night at Toby's bar before he downsizes. He told us last week that he couldn't afford the rent and he has a baby with another one on the way. Whatever the reason he told us that he was changing location to his mum's house so Friday night was our last night at Toby's bar as we know it.

Now I'm busy at school preparing tests for my MEP classes. It's hard for me to do because I have to give them all the same test knowing full well that some are better than others. So I'm struggling between making it too easy for some and too difficult for others. It doesn't matter too much anyway because the Thai teachers will change their marks anyway.

Just 2 more weeks of actual teaching, then it's a week and a half of invigilationg exams, then 2 weeks of English Camp and then it's holidaaaaaaysssss. Yesss!